The Beauty of Becoming More Selective After 50
The Older I Get, the Less Interested I Am in More, and the More Interested I Am in Better
Something unexpected has happened as I’ve gotten older.
I’ve become picky.
Not difficult.
Selective.
There’s a difference.
I’m more selective about what goes on my skin.
What goes into my body.
Who gets access to my time.
What conversations I participate in.
What I buy.
What I believe.
What I think.
What I carry forward.
And perhaps most importantly, what I’m finally willing to leave behind.
There was a time when abundance looked like more to me.
More products.
More plans.
More people.
More opportunities.
More clothes.
More proof that life was full.
Now I’m beginning to think abundance might actually be having enough clarity to know what deserves to stay.
Our Bathroom Cabinets Tell the Story
I see it in skincare all the time.
We accumulate.
A serum someone recommended.
A moisturizer that came in a subscription box.
A viral product.
A sample we might need on a trip in 2029.
Meanwhile, the products we actually love are sitting right there.
We know them.
We use them.
Our skin likes them.
I have become increasingly interested in products that earn their place.
My iS Clinical Warming Honey Cleanser is one of those.
They’re not on my shelf because someone told me I’m supposed to use them.
They’re there because they fit into the way I actually care for my skin.
That’s how I want more of my life to feel.
Maybe Our Lives Need Editing Too
There are things we keep long after they stop fitting us.
Sometimes because they’re familiar.
Sometimes because we invested so much time in them.
Sometimes because letting go would force us to admit we’ve changed.
Friendships.
Relationships.
Habits.
Expectations.
Versions of success.
Even identities.
One of the strange things about midlife is realizing we can be grateful for something and still be finished with it.
That’s taken me a while to understand.
Not everything we leave behind was bad.
Sometimes it simply belonged to a previous version of us.
Beauty Becomes More Interesting Too
I have no interest in disappearing as I age.
Quite the opposite.
But my definition of beauty has expanded.
Beautiful skin matters to me. Obviously. I’ve spent most of my professional life around it.
But so does vitality.
Curiosity.
Strength.
Peace.
Confidence.
Humor.
A woman who knows herself has a completely different kind of beauty than a woman trying desperately to be approved of.
And perhaps that’s one of the greatest opportunities of getting older.
We can finally stop auditioning.
“Anti-Aging” Isn’t My Goal
I’m not anti-aging.
I would like the privilege of doing quite a lot of it.
I am, however, very interested in aging well.
I want healthy skin.
A strong body.
An active mind.
Good relationships.
Interesting work.
A home I love.
A life that continues surprising me.
And yes, I’d also like my neck to cooperate.
We contain multitudes.
The Gift of Knowing What Isn’t for You
When we’re younger, we often learn through accumulation.
Try this.
Date him.
Take that job.
Buy the thing.
Say yes.
Go there.
Stay longer.
As we get older, experience gives us a different kind of intelligence.
We begin recognizing what isn’t ours.
And every no creates room for a better yes.
That’s what I’m appreciating about this season of my life.
I don’t need everything anymore.
I want the right things.
The right people.
The right work.
The right products.
The right pace.
The right kind of quiet.
Maybe aging doesn’t make our world smaller.
Maybe it gives us enough experience to curate it.
And I think there is something incredibly beautiful about that.
K
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